From the time I was born until 18 years of age I lived in the same town and pretty much the same house my entire life. I grew up in a town of a little over 2,000 people and went to K-12th grade with the exact same people. One of the best (and worst things at times) of living in a small town is that everyone knows you. Not everyone knows you at the same level, but 18 years is a long time to interact with people and you learn what they’re good at, what they’ve been through and about their character.You know who to call if you’re having car trouble, if your A/C breaks, if you want some fresh sweet corn on the cob, need the church opened, forgot something at school, or just need some company.
Since high school, the longest I have lived anywhere is our current residence….coming up on 2 years. I have really enjoyed the changes and the traveling, sometimes I even get a little antsy and feel like it’s almost time to move again, lol. The Lord definitely knew that I was going to have to move a lot and gave me a willing spirit and a little gypsy inside that makes moving fun. And, Wade is the best friend I could ever want to move around the country with!
Every once in a while though….I miss the comfort of being around people that have known me my whole life. (of course I mean my parents) but I also mean my friends. When I moved from West Texas, I definitely lost touch with most of my friends and have kept in close touch with only a couple. Most of the time I’m totally great and don’t even think about it…but recently I was sure missing being around people that know me.
I thought about how fun it would be to go plop down on my best friend’s couch, watch her TV, get whatever I wanted from her fridge and not have to answer all the questions that come when making friends with new people. So…I did seek out one of my best childhood friends and told her if she was around for the weekend, Wade and I were coming over. I hadn’t seen her in years, but we picked up right where we left off and she was such an encouragement to me.
The next week I was driving around town, running some errands, still thinking about how I felt largely unknown by most people here….Then…I heard it, soft, but clear as day…”I know you.” Whoa. I was overwhelmed….who did I hear in the car…Jesus. Instantly my heart was overwhelmed by the magnitude of such a gift and such a TRUTH. Instantly I was comforted and at peace. The human heart definitely has the desire to know and to be known and the person that knows you the most this side of heaven is your spouse, but Jesus knows you and understands you in the deepest, closest, most perfect way. I had been looking for that comfort of being known from people…but I did not feel the comfort and peace that came to my heart until I knew, really knew, that the God of the Universe KNOWS me…inside and out….and LOVES me completely and perfectly.
Psalm 139 definitely says it best. Here are a few of my favorite parts from it.
v. 1: O Lord, you have searched me and you know me.
v. 3: you are familiar with all my ways
v 13: For you created my inmost being; you knit me together in my mother’s womb
v 16: All the days ordained for me were written your book before one of the came to be
I know this truth but sometimes I only know it in my mind, but there are moments when God’s truth just sinks into the deepest part of your soul and you know what….it changes you, and it changes how you respond to the world.